Welcome to my blog!!

Welp, here goes.....not sure how I'll do at this but I'll give it a whirl! Hope you enjoy. "Yearning to be Average" has to do with my desire & goal to just be an average size person.

Friday, January 28, 2011

All I wanna do is zumba, zumba, zumba, zoom.....

Okay not really.....I did go to a zumba class this past Tuesday evening with 3 friends & fellow baseball moms.  What a relief that was -- to have friends with you who were willing to make fools of themselves right alongside you  -- that made such a difference!

Alas....not enough of a difference to make me go back.  You have to understand my personality first to know why this didn't work.  First off, zumba involves a lot of hip movement and booty shaking.  If you know me, you know I'm just not the booty-shaking type.  Not to mention the hip swinging, which I didn't even begin to know how to do.  It was a huge step for me to even be willing to go to this class.  Having my friends with me gave me just enough courage to do it.

The funny thing was, during the class, I didn't have too hard of a time keeping up cardio-wise....I did sweat but I ALWAYS sweat when I work out so that was nothing new.  It felt about as intense as when I do a 2-mile run so no sweat there.  Haha.  Actually there was a lot of sweat but again, that's normal. Of course, part of the reason I may have been able to keep up without passing out was because probably 20-30% of the time I was lost in the moves they were doing and had to watch a few repetitions before doing it myself.  The class was very fast-paced and while the instructor did do a few modifications for us newbies, I still felt lost and kinda like an idiot much of the time.  That in and of itself I don't think would keep me from going...I know logically that if I go more often I'd catch on fairly quickly.  I do think it would be a good supplement to my regular cardio workouts in the morning.

That said, the #1 reason I would probably not go back to THIS zumba class.....one of the ladies that was in the class that we all know.  It's sad to say but this woman was the main reason the 4 of us had been so hesitant to go in the first place.  She's an instructor at this zumba place and we were excited to find out that the class we had planned to go to was not one that she taught.  Little did we know, however, that she would still be there just to participate in the class!!   I know that sounds awful but she alone is the main reason I would choose not to go back....and it's difficult to explain why.  All of us at one time or another have felt threatened by her with our husbands (she is WAY too flirtatious among other things), have felt demeaned by her, have felt like a bug she was looking at under a microscope, criticizing.  She's just NOT a nice person and not someone I choose to spend time with during a vulnerable time.  Zumba was already difficult for me to put myself out there to do because of my personality -- somewhat introverted (according to my husband), and shy. Throw in someone that makes your stomach turn and that pretty much decided it for me.  I think I would be willing to go to another class once in a while as a supplement, but it will be at a different facility.  That's unfortunate because this place is only 5 minutes away. ** Just want to add that this particular woman is not on my friends list or any of my friends' lists' so she won't see this, can't have you thinking that I'm that mean! :-p

To add insult to injury, I discovered when I got home that I left my sneakers there!  The instructor wanted you to wear a different pair of shoes during the class than you wore when you got there.  I assume that this was because of all the ice and snow we've had. So when we finished class we were all too busy trying to hurry out of there and laughing that I walked out without my shoes!  Thank goodness they were a really old pair and not my new ones that Jerry got me for my birthday.  Do you think I've been brave enough to go back and get them yet?  Nope!  But I intend to.  I think. 

Oh well -- my friends and I all laughed SO much at ourselves that night, thankful that it wasn't on tape for the general public to see.  I guess in that sense, it was worth it.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Goooooooaallllllls! (imagine that said by the soccer announcer)

So I thought it was a good idea to lay out what my goals are, both tangible & intangible (is that even a word?) for this 'health & fitness' journey.  I think just putting it in writing makes it in a way, more valuable.

Goal # 1: The clothes.  To be average. This is the whole point of me starting this journey anyway....to be 'average.'  For as long as I can remember as an adult I've shopped either in the plus-size section of a store or in a plus-size store itself. One of my major complaints as a plus-size shopper is the store either has a pitiful plus-size section (Target.....oh how I love thee....but not your plus-size section, which you try to hide in the furthest corner next to maternity, so much so that I can't tell half the time which stuff is maternity & which is plus); or it's a hit-or-miss whether you find something (Fashion Bug.....you either have cute stuff or old-lady nylon stuff....there's no middle with you!)  So I want to be able to shop in a regular store, in a regular-size section.  I want to be able to take my purchases to the checkout without being concerned about the clerk seeing what size I wear.

Goal # 2:  The race. To run a 5k - namely, the Tunnel to Towers Run in NYC.  Almost every year for the past 4-5 years, my husband Gerard, a firefighter and native New Yorker, has run a 5k in NYC on the last Sunday in September.  It's in honor of Stephen Siller, a firefighter who was heading home on the morning of September 11th.  He heard the calls on his fire radio and knew he had to head to the Towers.  Problem was, they had closed off the Brooklyn Battery Tunnel to traffic so Stephen, with his FULL gear on, ran from the Brooklyn side of the tunnel, through the tunnel and up to the Twin Towers, where he died along with 342 other firefighters (and too many others), leaving his wife Sally & 5 children.  It's always very moving emotionally to watch this race and be there at the finish line to cheer on all the runners.  This year it's my turn!  For the first time I'm planning to run it with Jerry. Tunnel to Towers Run

Goal # 3:  The numbers. To lose 80-90 pounds.  This would put me in a much better weight range and give me much better cardio health. To date I have lost 29 pounds (since November 4th, when I did my first official-like weigh-in). 

This is really putting myself out there but I wanted to include the dreaded picture I referred to in yesterday's post, the one that mortified me.  I thought about not putting it on here but my intent is to share the good, the bad, & the ugly....I guess this is the 'lowlights' I was referring to as well. In any case it will be good to have to refer back to as the 'before' picture!


Another day I'd like to share what I've been doing at the gym, with food, how my husband is the best trainer ever, etc. but I learned from one of my favorite fellow-bloggers *cough* MELISSA *cough*, that a good cliffhanger is always helpful! So I'll just leave it at that.  Which, ironically, is not really a cliffhanger but you get the idea.  I want you to come back.  ;)

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Here goes nothing!

Where do I even begin?  Long ago on a beautiful fall day, a baby girl was born......okay, I kid, I kid.  I guess we'll see how this goes, I may stink at this and you may be bored.  Or I may even be bored by my boring self.  :)

I thought it was a great idea to copy off one of my best friends Terri (see her blog here: Terri's blog ) and put down in writing what my goals are, how I'm doing with those goals, and maybe some highlights (and lowlights?) of my journey to an 'average' me! (Average as opposed to overweight/obese).

My entire life I've been somewhat overweight (as a child), to severely overweight/obese? as an adult.  My breaking point(s) came at the end of the summer in 2010.  Breaking point # 1: We took a vacation to Florida to see my in-laws and while there I just did NOT feel well.  Much of the visit I was tired, felt like my blood sugar was dropping if I didn't eat, etc.  That started to scare me. 

Breaking point # 2:  My son Isaiah went to the World Series in Brooklyn with his baseball team towards the end of July 2010.  At the end of the World Series (THEY WON THE WHOLE THING!!), we all took celebratory pictures with our kids & their trophies, etc.  And it's cliche, yes, but when I uploaded the pics I was horrified at how I looked!  For some reason you never look that overweight/fat in your head. 

So those are 2 of my biggest motivators.....of course I didn't get started with my fitness routine full-steam until November but that's neither here nor there.  Ha!

I will go into more of my motivations another day, don't want to bore you to death on my first post! 
Thanks for reading, I hope to be encouraged by starting this blog & maybe even encourage you in some way.